Andy Martin: Contrarian Commentary

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Thursday, April 08, 2010

Andy Martin: “Long green” drove Tiger Woods back to the golf greens

Andy Martin analyzes Tiger Woods’ income, expenses and portfolio allocation, and says that a potential cash crunch and the need to reassure sponsors drove Tiger Woods to cut back his “therapy” and return to the Masters.

Internet Powerhouse Andy Martin on what forced the return of Tiger Woods to the golf links

ContrarianCommentary.com
“The Internet Powerhouse”
Andy Martin
Executive Editor

“Factually Correct, Not
Politically Correct”


FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

Andy Martin “connects the dots” between Tiger Woods’ income, overhead, assets, investments and cost pressures to resume playing golf

(NEW YORK)(April 8, 2010) Tiger Woods returns to the golf links today. The Chairman of Augusta National boxed Woods’ ears on Tuesday. Sports writers are perched like rabbits awaiting Woods’ return. Woods’ “army” of security guards is poised to collar any bimbo eruptions.

I am not a sports writer, and I have never played a round of golf. While I was intrigued and amused by Wood’s “secret life,” I am not going to analyze Wood’s sexual preoccupations. But as someone who has invested money for over half a century and began life as an economist, I was asked for an opinion on Woods’ finances. Here is the result of our due diligence.

We are going to answer the question that no one has really asked: why did Woods rush back to golf so soon after his career was torpedoed by his own insufferable arrogance?

Woods needs the cash.

“Long green” has brought Woods back to the golf greens.

In all of the mountains of coverage devoted to Woods’ sexual peccadilloes, no one until this column has actually analyzed Wood’s cash crunch and his need to work to pay the bills.

Common references to Woods usually call him a “billion-dollar” golfer. No one has gone any further, to actually analyze Wood’s finances by delving into his cash position and investment portfolio. ContrarianCommentary.com has.

On closer examination, Woods appears to have been forced back to work by his cash needs.

Start with the “billion-dollar” earnings figure. As a gross amount, it’s impressive. But career earnings tell us nothing about his current cash in the bank.

Woods paid taxes on that cool billion. He was not left with a billion to spend.

Then Woods allocated his earnings to (A) lifestyle expenses and (B) investments.

We have studied Woods’ “burn rate” to come up with a monthly overhead. Woods has a major cost structure to support. Yes, he earns a lot. But like many successful executives he also spends a lot. His monthly “nut” is substantial. Unlike paramours, overhead can’t be dumped quite as quickly or easily.

His wife uses the family Gulfstream jet as though it is a local taxi. There are houses, boats, maids and groundskeepers. There is the cost of moving his retinue around. There are fees to agents and supporters. Money, money, money.

When everyone has their hands out, even fifty million dollars a year can fly out the door pretty fast. We estimate Woods was burning through a minimum of $12 million a year, and possibly as much as $25 million.

Woods may have also felt the need to “liquefy” his assets to find a potential premarital divorce settlement. Going back to work was a quick and obvious option.

On the revenue side, Woods’ income has suffered during the past five months. Lucrative sponsors have dropped Tiger as their pitch man. But the overhead costs of running his operation have not dropped. So Woods was/is facing ongoing cost pressures even while his income was/is contracting. Not good.

It gets worse.

Woods, in common with most wealthy individuals, has an “office” that manages his life. The office also superintends his investments. Unless Woods is the first person in history not to make a bad investment, his balance sheet has suffered along with the market decline and the decline of assets in his portfolio.

Wealthy investors tend to gravitate to tax-sheltered investments (yes, they did that even during the low-tax reign of George W. Bush). Even if Woods’ investment portfolio was not suffering cash losses it was almost inevitably shrinking in value.

Wood’s investments are also likely to include substantial illiquid holdings. His advisers no doubt steered him away from listed stocks and suggested “private equity” as a safer haven. But “private equity” deals have not proven to be great investments, except for the sponsors who collect inflated fees and deliver deflated performance.

So Woods has fixed costs, shrinking income and a fair amount of his net worth that is tied up in shrinking and illiquid investments.

The result: Mr. Woods had to go back to work to replenish his bank account. My best information: Woods’ financial advisers told him he had to cut short his “therapy” and get back to work.

The need for long green drove Tiger Woods back to the golf greens. It was the potential for future financial eruptions, not the fear of bimbo eruptions, which was the decisive factor in Wood’s return to the links.

Fore!

Footnote: ContrarianCommentary was supposed to resume regular publication earlier. Our resumption was further delayed by minor surgery that (we hope) has now been successfully completed. But we’re coming back with blockbuster analysis of Obama, America and the world. Stay tuned.
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Readers of Obama: The Man Behind The Mask, say the book is still the only gold standard and practical handbook on Barack Obama's unfitness for the presidency. Buy it. Book orders: Amazon.com or OrangeStatePress.com. Immediate shipment from Amazon.com or signed copies (delayed for signing) from the publisher are available.
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Andy Martin is a legendary Chicago muckraker, author, Internet columnist, radio talk show host, broadcaster and media critic. He has over forty years of broadcasting background in radio and television and is the dean of Illinois media and communications. He is currently promoting his best-selling book, Obama: The Man Behind The Mask and promoting his new Internet movie “Obama: The Hawai’i years.” Andy is the Executive Editor and publisher of www.ContrarianCommentary.com.

Martin comments on regional, national and world events with more than four decades of experience. He holds a Juris Doctor degree from the University of Illinois College of Law and is a former adjunct professor of law at the City University of New York.

UPDATES:
www.Twitter.com/AndyMartinUSA
www.Facebook.com/AndyMartin

His columns are also posted at ContrarianCommentary.blogspot.com; contrariancommentary.wordpress.com.
[NOTE: We try to correct typographical errors and additions/subtractions on our blogs, where you can find the latest edition of this column.]

MEDIA CONTACT: (866) 706-2639 E-MAIL: AndyMart20@aol.com
© Copyright by Andy Martin 2010.

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Thursday, December 03, 2009

Andy Martin on the Obamas, the Salahis, the Woods’ and Santa Claus

Andy Martin connects Barack and Michelle Obama, Tareq and Michaele Salahi, and Tiger Woods to Santa Claus’ claims of “executive privilege” and demands for “privacy” at the North Pole.

Andy Martin on the Obama and the Woods family scandals
ContrarianCommentary.com
Andy Martin
Executive Editor


“Factually Correct, Not
Politically Correct”

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

Are the Obamas the new White House version of TV’s “The Jeffersons?”

Do the Obamas and Salahis share common characteristics?

Should Tiger Woods try to crash a White House party to reclaim his “privacy?”

What does Santa have to say about all of this commotion?

(CHICAGO)(December 3, 2009) A third of a century ago, President Richard Nixon created the modern era of “separation of powers” jurisprudence by claiming "executive privilege" to prevent White House aides from testifying before Congress and courts. Nixon created a major constitutional scandal. And lost.

In 2009, the Obama Family White House, which is looking increasingly like the TV sitcom “The Jeffersons,” is claiming executive privilege to prevent staff members from disclosing the truth about the couple that has been called the “White House party crashers.” Tareq and Michaele Salahi may have to star in a new sitcom, the “Real Housewives of the White House.”

By “stonewalling” the Congress (“stonewalling” is another “Watergate word”) Obama is making what should have been a minor embarrassment into a minor constitutional scandal. Like Nixon, he’s losing.

As the overall history of the episode unfolds it increasingly appears as though the Salahis were trying to be legitimately invited, and crossed-signals existed at several levels.

African-Americans, of course, are trying to convert the embarrassing incident of the Salahi social climbers into a national security threat involving potential terrorists. Congressman Bennie Thompson is trying to revive fears of a racial attack on Obama. I don’t think the Salahis' misbehavior is a light matter, but it is equally not a threat to the republic. In fact, security services often learn from their occasional mistakes. Let’s hope the Secret Service did. No one wishes the Obamas any physical harm.

It is clear that in trying to do things their way, “the Chicago Way,” the Obamas are increasingly taking on the airs of “The Jeffersons,” the social climbing TV sitcom family with whom the Obamas seem to share some characteristics. Why was security reduced after Obama took over the White House? Trying to make the place look more open? Putting on the Ritz? Ooops.

The Salahis and Obamas could also be peas in the same pod, or podcast. The Salahis were trying to crash a party at the White House; the Obamas crashed the White House in 2008, with a campaign of lies and misrepresentations that were much more toxic than the Salahis' pretensions.

Obama had no business in the White House. In that regard, he shares a lot in common with Tareq and Michaele Salahi.

Turning from the Jeffersons/Obamas/Salahis to Tiger Woods, I have resurrected another old Illinois political chestnut: “What was he thinking?” How did Woods think he could get away with it?

Tiger Woods’ “prossies” are popping up like daisies. If one lady really got $150,000 for her story, there may be more “lovers” of Mr. Woods who wish to appear. Woods’ defense? He says his family “intimacy” must be private, and can only be “shared by us alone.” Some "intimacy."

It seems to me Woods was sharing his charms with a lot of people that are clearly not part of his “family,” unless Woods’ definition of “family” is very different than the common American usage of the term. Greeks call everyone “cousin.” Does Woods call all of these ladies “mama?”

Woods can’t invoke “executive privilege” to shield his mendacity and hypocrisy, so he is invoking the common man’s version of executive privilege, “privacy.” But how can you be "private" when your picture is splattered across almost every wall in every air terminal around the United States? How indeed.

How can you be a model for young people when they listen to the alleged “sex tapes” of Woods trying to cover up his embarrassing disclosures? Or the messages boasting of his prowess in matters not involving a caddy?

Mr. Woods has received bad advice. If he had owned up to his mistakes and been honest and open about his marital problems, instead of repeatedly invoking “privacy,” the scandal might have gone away. Every day brings new disclosures of infidelity and new women seeking a payout (is it a “handout”) for baring all about their time spent in the sack with the Tiger.

The only thing missing: when is Tiger going to try and crash a White House party, claming that is the only place he feels private enough? It’s coming. Can the Tiger Woods “birthers” be far behind?

The silly season of mid-December news is upon us. What? There’s no Santa Claus? Omigod. What will they expose next? Isn’t Santa entitled to his privacy? Doesn’t he deserve some “executive privilege” with his elves at the North Pole?

Is Santa really going to replace Rudolph and the reindeer with a golf cart? Only Tiger Woods can tell us. And he’s not talking. Remember, if you decide to get Santa’s attention, bash in the rear windows to see his reaction, not the driver-side window. Not at all. As Santa would say, “Ho. Ho. Ho.” Or as Tiger Woods would say: “ho, ho, ho.” Where are the Salahis and Obamas when we really need them? Watching reruns of “The Jeffersons,” no doubt.

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Readers of Obama: The Man Behind The Mask, say the book is still the only gold standard and practical handbook on Barack Obama's unfitness for the presidency. Buy it.
Book orders: Amazon.com or http://OrangeStatePress.com. Immediate shipment from Amazon.com or signed copies (delayed for signing) from the publisher are available.
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www.CommitteeofOneMilliontoDefeatBarackObama.com
Please give generously. Our ability to fight and defeat Barack Obama's political agenda is directly dependent on the generosity of every American.
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Andy Martin is a legendary Chicago muckraker, author, Internet columnist, radio talk show host, broadcaster and media critic. He has over forty years of broadcasting background in radio and television and is the dean of Illinois media and communications. He is currently promoting his best-selling book, Obama: The Man Behind The Mask and producing the new Internet movie “Obama: The Hawai’i years.” Andy is the Executive Editor and publisher of www.ContrarianCommentary.com.

Martin comments on regional, national and world events with more than four decades of experience. He holds a Juris Doctor degree from the University of Illinois College of Law and is a former adjunct professor of law at the City University of New York. He is a candidate for Barack Obama’s former U. S. Senate seat in the February 2, 2010 Republican Party primary election.

UPDATES:
www.twitter.com/AndyMartinUSA
www.facebook.com/AndyMartin

His columns are also posted at ContrarianCommentary.blogspot.com; contrariancommentary.wordpress.com.
[NOTE: We try to correct any typographical errors in this story on our blogs; find our latest edition there.]
MEDIA CONTACT: (866) 706-2639 or CELL (917) 664-9329 (cell not always on)
E-MAIL: AndyMart20@aol.com
© Copyright by Andy Martin 2009.

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